Our USA Today Best Years Magazine Interview

We were interviewed by the award winning journalist Jennifer E. Mabry for the USA Today Best Years (Fabulous Living at 50+) 2019 Fall/Winter edition. The topic of the discussion was “50–Embracing Midlife”. It is a topic that “thisisyourbestyear” is very familiar with.

Adding to the conversation were three other women of a certain age. They were Amy Yontef-McCrath who is a volunteer extraordinaire who sat a goal of volunteering to at least 50 projects between birthday 49 and 50. She completed it with time to spare, and is now deciding upon the next goal for this part of her life.

Also included in the conversation was relationship expert and therapist Dr. Audrey Chapman. She gave insight into being mentally and physically healthy as we mature. Brigid Schulte who is an author and journalist discussed work-life balance as we enter different phases of our life.

It was our honor to be included in this conversation. The link to the article is below. You can purchase the magazine at your local news stands or on line on the USA Today Magazines site.

Embracing Midlife

Remember “thisisyourbestyear”. You are never too old to live your best life and do the “happy dance”–we are proof. Just go for it.

Things They Don’t Tell You About Growing Up

Remember when you were growing up, and at each step of the way there was someone there to give you guidance on what would happen to you as you aged. There was someone who would answer questions before you asked them. How to shave your legs, underarms and more.

It seems as time goes on, you have to figure out things for yourself. There are things that you never thought about that are happening to you as you mature (age sounds so old).

No one told you that a pair of tweezers would become a beauty necessity. One that you have to have multiple pairs of. One in each bathroom at home, and especially one in your carry on if you can get it past TSA, or at least one in your checked baggage. The hair on your head may start to thin, it just grows somewhere else–your face.

We can all remember when we wondered what the hell a lip wax was–well now you know. It’s not so much about shaving your legs as it is keeping hair off of your face.

No one told you that you would return to your childhood and remember that statement that your mom uttered many times when she would ask you if you had to go to the bathroom–“just go and try”. As you mature, it seems like you decide to check and see if you do have to go all the time. It’s better to be safe than sorry. There is no drinking soda or even water while traveling–especially on planes (bathroom is too little).

There are so many things that they forgot to tell us as we mature, but it’s okay, we were always quick learners. Share with us some of the things you’ve learned on this journey of maturing. You can now color coordinate your tweezers just remember “thisisyourbestyear”.

Tea and Talk Discussion–Becoming by Michelle Obama

Join “thisisyourbestyear” on Thursday, May 23 at 6:30 pm at Leaves Tea and Book Shop for a sip of tea and great conversation of the Michelle Obama book–“Becoming”.

We will sip tea and have a great discussion of this important and honest story of the the former First Lady of the United States of America. Join us for an intellectual, though-provoking, honest, fun and real conversation about what we can understand, feel, and learn from this powerful book with some great networking too.

Registration is required. Tickets are free for this event. Go to Eventbrite and register.

Leaves Tea and Book Shop @ 120 St. Louis #101, Fort Worth, TX 76104

Remember “thisisyourbestyear” let’s relax and have great conversation while we sip great tasting tea.

What I Gave Up For Lent

Yep, I’m fasting–not eating meat from Monday through Friday, and only a small amount on Saturday and Sunday. You know for Lent you are asked to give up something, and most people give up some form of food. Does it bother me, not really, but kind. You know what I mean when you give up something then you tend to want it even more. I even went to the world famous Primanti Bros. in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania with their huge sandwiches, and ate a green salad. Who knew they put French fries on their salad and name it a Pittsburgh salad–there is justice in the world.

Our visit to the world famous Primanti Bros
in the Strip District.

I not only gave up some form of food I decided to give up something else. Something that I have been talking about for years. I decided to give up self-doubt and second guessing myself. Even as a woman of a certain age I still have self-doubt and continue to second guess myself.

Not eating meat has led to some changes in my diet and in my overall health. Has the cutting back on the consumption of meat (in this case it does include fish and poultry) caused me to have weight loss–no, but I haven’t gained any either. I’m still maintaining.

But the elimination of self-doubt and second guessing has made a major difference in my life and attitude. It’s a freeing feeling, one that is hard to explain. It’s a good feeling.

Some people have given up shopping, eating sweets, eating fried foods, eating carbs–food, food, food. This guy told me he was going to give up exercising. The problem being he doesn’t exercise. Years ago a minister said maybe we should give up something other than food–something like maybe gossip so I tried giving up self-doubt.

Will I ever have self-doubt again? I’m sure I will, but it will quickly disappear because I’ve learned to control it. Will I ever eat meat again on Monday through Friday–you betcha. But I really don’t miss it.

As women of a certain age, we need to be in control of our lives to make them better. What are you giving up to make your life better? By the way in addition to giving something up, you are to pray/meditate more. Maybe that’s the reason I can conquer self-doubt and second guessing myself.

Remember “thisisyourbestyear”. Instead of saying what’s the worst that could happen, ask yourself what’s the best that could happen–then make it happen.

Mom. Sister. Friend. Go Red.

Go Red for Women turns 15 this year. It was started to bring awareness among women about the number one killer of women–heart disease* and stroke. The Go Red Movement is about more than wearing the beautiful color of red on the first Friday of February.

It is about women taking control of their own health. Women making the committment to their health. Learning that they can work together with others while helping them with their health concerns.

Fort Worth’s/Tarrant County’s Go Red Luncheon will be held on Friday, February 15, 2019 at 10 am at the Omni Hotel in downtown Fort Worth. While there you can gather information on heart disease, learn how to prepare heart healthy meals, have your blood pressure checked, hear from an outstanding speaker and more.

The funds raised will help to build awareness and support research and education initiatives.

There is still have time to purchase tickets to this years Fort Worth Go Red Luncheon.

Remember “thisisyourbestyear”.

This year’s theme for Fort Worth’s Go Red Luncheon is:

Mother. Sister. Friend.

Together we can save the lives of women we love.

*Just reported today that over half of all Americans have some form of heart disease.

Check with your local branch of the American Heart Associaton to find tickets to their Go Red Luncheon or to donate.

Dementia–Might Just Be Menopause Transition

Just read this article The Brain Fog Of Menopause Can Burn Off by Jane E. Brody. It talks about the effects of menopause on memory, and the misdiagnosis of the symptoms leading to some doctors falsely informing patients that they have frontotemporal dementia.

I don’t know about you, but I have been there, and am still there. I’ve started to read with intention, and I even take pictures of where I park at the airport. Don’t laugh it helps.

Take a look at the article, and remember “thisisyourbestyear”–this too shall pass.

Cervical Cancer Awareness

Somebody is probably saying another month and another disease–what color ribbon are we wearing this time? It’s about our health, the health of our daughters, mothers, grandmothers. It’s the health of all women.

We tend to do for others, but forget about ourselves. Getting that husband to the doctor is sometimes a hassle, but if we persist we can get him there. Let’s take ourselves to the doctor when things seem a little out of kilter.

Cervical cancer is one that can take years to form. This is one major reason that we should take the uncomfortable pap smear every year.

Even though the the death rate has fallen over the years for those that are diagnosed with cervical cancer any death is too many. Cervical cancer usually does not strike younger women under the age of 20, but as we mature we tend to think we are immune to this form of cancer. In fact women over the age of 65 make up over 15 percent of the cervical cancer cases in the United States. A few myths are listed below.

As we mature our bodies change, and as we know things happen that did not happen before. Do not take these changes lightly, they may not be anything, but it is always best to have them checked out.

Here are some of the symptoms of cervical cancer that should not be ignored.

  • Bleeding after intercourse
  • Bleeding after menopause
  • Bleeding between periods
  • Bleeding after douching
  • Bleeding following a pelvic exam (spotting is normal)
  • Having heavier menstrual periods than usual or ones that last longer than usual
  • Unusual vaginal discharge
  • Pain during sex

Take time to talk with your doctor. Remember “thisisyourbestyear”. Know why you are wearing that ribbon and spread the knowledge. Our lives depend on it.

The Scars Of Breast Cancer Are Not Pretty In Pink

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month, and everyone will be wearing pink in the form of ribbons, shirts, tee shirts and more.  What we see doing this awareness month is everyone being “pretty in pink”.

We have all known someone who has been affected by this horrific disease, or we may be that person. Most survivors carry scars from their treatments to defeat breast cancer.  Some of the scars are physical, but some are mental and not only affect them, but their loved ones too.  There are those women and men who carry both types of scars. Breast cancer is an equal opportunity disease, it does not discriminate when it comes to who is affected by it.

Sometimes the chemo may cause the hair to fall out, it can even affect the color of ones skin tone.  The scars of mastectomies may be covered, but they are there nonetheless.  Some survivors have lymphedema in their arms after the mastectomies.

Mammograms do not catch every type of breast cancer, but they do aid in the detection of many.  This imaging can be expensive if you do not have health insurance.  There are places in every community that offer free or low cost services.  Below is a list of  some of the ones in Tarrant County and the surrounding counties in Texas.  Please share with us those in your area so that everyone can benefit from these services.

Remember “thisisyourbestyear”.  Breast Cancer Awareness Month is about more than being “pretty in pink”.  It’s about being informed and finding a cure.

breast cancer 3

 

 

 

Things That Make You Go Hmmm

As we grow up, things that happen to us can make us go hmmm and scratch our heads at these new symptoms. Some call it the aging process, others say it’s just Father Time catching up, and most of us just say it’s life.

There are ailments that pop up with symptoms that we have never had before.  What are some of these you might ask?  Well here are just a few.

  • The nerve in your tooth dies–seriously.  Warm liquids seem to make your tooth radiate, but not hurt.  This means that you need a root canal to stop this awful feeling.
  • You have sharp abdominal pain after eating.  You are now diagnosed as being lactose intolerant.  No more cheese, cream based entrees or ice cream.  In other words no milk based products for you.
  • Bloating from eating bread has started.  Not really all bread, but most.
  • Eye floaters start to bother you.  It’s kind of like you are swatting gnats.  They are harmless, but they are very annoying.
  • Heart palpitations which are scary.  Causes could be sugar, caffeine or alcohol.  You think to yourself which one do I have to give up?  I have become a decaf (yuck) coffee drinker, giving up most sugar except on birthdays and weddings (I love wedding cake).  There is no more chocolate for me since it is a double whammy with sugar and caffeine.  But there is a silver lining–wine is okay.

There are many other things that happen to us as we go through life, but I have a sorority sister who always finds the silver lining in things. The one silver lining I see from being lactose intolerant (and I hardly ever ate ice cream anyway), cutting out most sugar, most breads and caffeine is that I am able to control my weight and I can still have wine.

It’s my new normal, and it’s not so bad. We do what we have to do.  Remember “thisisyourbestyear”, and cheers!

Does anyone know of a good decaf brand of coffee?

It Gets Easier With Age

Remember when you tried to please everyone? Remember how hard it was to say no to people especially those that you really cared about or a group you wanted to be a part of? Remember how you didn’t want to hurt their feelings when they asked a question they probably already knew the answer to?

Well guess what? As we age, it gets easier to say what is on your mind, but most importantly we now have permission to say no and not give a reason why. We can tell the reason for the no answer, but it is not a requirement, it is an option.

This goes for everyone in the family. I know what most of you are thinking–you’re thinking about the grandchildren and babysitting. Although sometimes you do have plans or you just don’t feel like it–it happens no matter how sweet and cute they are. You just want to put your feet up, watch a movie, take a nap in other words you don’t feel like it. So the answer is no.

It could be with your hubby or significant other when they say let’s go to dinner. Do they want to go to (name their favorite place), and you don’t want to eat there, just say no. When he asks where you want to go, give him suggestions that you like.

Since we are of a certain age, most of us learned to type. So at committee meetings especially if we are one of the few females in attendance they always  ask if we can take the notes for this meeting. We grudgingly do, and then we have to type them up, and now we have become the recording secretary. Next time they ask you, tell them no you can’t unless of course you like that position. I seem to remember guys in my typing class so why not let them take and type the minutes?

The first few times you say the word no to something you’ve always wanted to say no to will feel a little weird, and it will shock those that you say it to.

Sometimes the word yes can be used to your benefit. How many of us have had this question--“do you mind if I switch the channel”, and we say no. Next time say yes if you are watching something that you like.

When we finally figure out that it’s okay to say no I don’t, or yes I do mind because that’s how we feel then we must do one other thing. We must stop apologizing. It’s just how we feel, no I don’t want to do something and/or yes I do mind.

Think of yourself as a toddler. When you ask them a question, and they say no there is no explanation, no apology just on to the next question. Don’t feel bad, you will again keep the grandchildren, eat at his favorite place and probably take notes at a committee meeting, but you now know that you can stop trying to please everyone.

Start pleasing yourself and learning the art of saying “no” and “yes I do mind”–remember “thisisyourbestyear”.