Welcome to This is Your Best Year!!!

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Welcome to “thisisyourbestyear”!  You and I are on this journey together.  Together and collectively, we will give suggestions on living life to the fullest.  This is a blog for women who thought that when they reached this age, life was over.  This is for all of those women who thought their mothers were old at this age–well they may have been, but that’s not the case anymore.

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We will discuss everything from health, beauty, faith, life, children, grandchildren, exercise, careers, retirement, starting all over again in love and/or career. We will talk about learning the word no, taking time to be who we are.  With this blog we will have fun, we will talk fashion, food, travel and all kinds of products–in other words, we’re going to talk about us.

You can always email us at  thisisyourbestyear@gmail.com and see all the things we are doing by visiting us at thisisyourbestyear on these social media sites–Facebook, Instagram, Tumblr and YouTube.  We are also on Twitter at: thisisyourbestyear@mariciajohns.

Let’s get excited ladies, and stay tuned.  Remember–“THIS IS YOUR BEST YEAR”!

THE YOU’LL BE OKAY GENERATION

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I finally figured out why we as women of a certain age won’t social distance, stay at home, or wear a mask. It was easy once I thought of it. We are the generation whose parents didn’t tell us about the dangers of life–at least for the most part. I know there was the polio vaccine, but day to day things were left up to us. We grew up hearing the phrase “you’ll be okay”.

We were the generation that grew up without seatbelts. You remember how four or five kids would be sitting in the back seat with the window rolled down, and if they were lucky enough to sit by the window, they would ride with their arm dangling out. And then there was a mom in the front seat holding the baby in her lap. We would sit on our knees and look out the rear window, and wait for our dad to go fast and over and down so that we could be thrown in the air, not realizing the danger.

Then there was the pickup truck. Remember sitting in the bed of the truck with your brother, uncle, or some other male racing down the street–not the highway, but usually some country road. Where every time they hit a bump, you would be thrown as high or higher than the top of the cab. Shoot, I remember sitting on the side of the cab, and the boys standing on the side as we raced along the country roads. Who knew this was dangerous?

I know we all remember when the station wagon was a car to have, and we would fight to get in the back so we could play. We would laugh and have so much fun as the driver turned the corner sharply so that we would be thrown around–it was fun. We never thought about danger, and it kept us from fighting about where to sit in the backseat.

In our teen years–well we’ll let that go, but you remember sitting all up under your boyfriend as he drove you around town–no seatbelt. It was love, not danger.

Then there were those cold mornings when we got ready for school, and we backed up to the heater in our pajamas (gowns) to get warm. I do remember a child’s gown catching on fire, but parents then told us to be careful and not get too close.

We rode bicycles with no helmets, and sometimes no brakes. We put younger, smaller kids on the back and sometimes the handlebars. We had no fear. We ate fish and got the bone caught in our throat–no one went to the doctor, your parents gave you white bread to eat, and when you swallowed it moved the bone down-because “you’d be okay”.

In the country, we burned trash and watched how pretty the colors of the flames were. I did get burned–again no doctor visit.

I think my favorite was when they sprayed for mosquitoes. The kids would run behind the truck and inhale the pesticides, and for the life of me, I don’t remember anyone dying from it. I can’t remember parents telling you not to run behind the mosquito truck. If they did, no one listened.

It’s our parents’ fault. They made us think we were invincible, that nothing could harm or kill us. They constantly told us that we would be okay, and we believed them.

These are just a few tongue in cheek things that I remember as a child. Our parents did teach us about the dangers of life as they were when we were growing up. Times were different.

The one thing that we forgot that our parents taught us was that we should wash our hands, cover our mouths when we sneeze or cough and be kind and considerate of others.

So since we don’t believe that fat meat is greasy (East Texas saying), let’s be kind to others by social distancing and wearing a mask. We want to be around to make our children and grandchildren think they are never in danger. Remember “thisisyourbestyear”. For all of my sisters that are complaining about lip color, let’s just coordinate our masks with our outfits. Take a look at one of my favorite scenes in a movie. As the late John Witherspoon would say “you’ve got to coordinate”. Start a new trend.

Coordinate your mask with your outfit.

Be Safe! We know how to take care of our families, ourselves, others, and still, look good. Just coordinate.

MOM KNEW BEST

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If we took the advice our mothers gave us years ago we might not be in the predicament that we are in, or at least it might not be as bad. In this pandemic of COVID-19, we have seen the good, the bad and the ugly. Our mothers taught us how to avoid these situations.

Before COVID-19, she taught us to wash our hands. I am sure you remember how she held you up to the sink as you played in the water with the bar soap, and she explained why you needed to wash your hands. When you played in the dirt she had you wash your hands, before you ate anything you washed your hands, you were learning to be potty trained and you washed your hands.

Then one day she added another element to the hand washing routine. You sneezed or coughed, and she told you to cover your mouth, and then told you to wash your hands. Hand washing had become ingrained in us.

In the age of hand sanitizer, we started to disinfect our hands almost hourly. If we touched a doorknob, shook hands and more we were disinfecting our hands. What happened? Somewhere along the road, we didn’t teach our children and grandchildren this valuable lesson of personal hygiene–washing our hands, and covering our mouths.

Our mothers would not let us go to school with a fever because they didn’t want us to infect anyone else, but now our children play games with people’s lives trying to see who will be the first person to get sick. Most of the time our mothers used their hands to take temperatures. If they felt that you had a fever, you couldn’t go out to play or visit your grandparents because the grandparents were older and might catch whatever you had. It was called common courtesy.

Our mothers taught us along with our teachers to read, write, have a good conversation so that boredom would not settle in and cripple us. We learned to eat what we had because we ate to live not live to eat. We played on the front porch, ran in the backyard with most games we made up ourselves. Our mothers taught us to use our imagination. They taught us to play alone and with others. They taught us to set the table for dinner (we called it supper), sit down and eat as a family, and have great conversations about almost anything.

We’re not saying that these things would have stopped the pandemic, but since the experts are telling us to do these things now, it probably would have helped. If we remembered what our mothers taught us we wouldn’t have to go grocery shopping daily so that our families could eat, we could make a meal out of almost anything, they did and we enjoyed them. If we had listened to our mothers we would know more about our children because we would take the time to talk, listen, and discuss while we sat down to dinner.

Remember “thisisyourbestyear”. Let’s remember what our mothers taught us–wash our hands, cover our mouths, love your family, and make the best out of any situation. Be safe and wear a mask–if not for you then for others.

**Hand washing poster by Royal Pharmaceutical Society

NO NEED TO MISS ANOTHER PHONE CALL

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I went to a Zoom meeting that some would call grandparents meeting, senior citizens meeting, women of a certain age meeting even though there was one man in the meeting. This meeting was very informative. The program was the Senior Assist Program, and today it featured a presentation by a representative from the Specialized Telecommunications Assistance Program, STAP for short.

This was my first meeting of the Senior Assist Program, and I wanted to see what it was all about, and if I could learn something for myself or someone else. I learned a lot that I want to share with you.

The talk today was on communicating with those with disabilities such as hard of hearing, deaf, mobility issues, speech impediments and more. At this time I don’t have any of these, but I have a relative that does. This person is hard of hearing so when they talked about telephones that would assist them with talking on the telephone my ears perked up.

This program is available in most states, and it provides telephones, tablets and accessories to help people who need help enjoying a conversation on a phone. They do still have landlines, smartphones, tablets and more that have different features to assist the persons specific needs. They assist you in selecting the equipment that best suits each individual.

This service and the equipment is free of charge. You do have to fill out paperwork, send off proof of residency (you must live in the state that you are applying from. The person who will receive the equipment must sign the application. The only downside is that it does come from the state, and it can take anywhere from 2 to 4 months to get the equipment.

Here is a slideshow that will explain the program, the equipment and application more. It is from the Texas Health and Human Services Department. If you don’t live in Texas find your state’s Health and Human Services Department. In Texas you can also go to the Specialized Telecommunications Assistance Program site (STAP) to find more information. You may have to do some research in your state to find out about programs such as this, but it will be well worth the effort.

I’ll be going back to the next Senior Assist Program because if I don’t need the information, I know someone who does. Remember “thisisyourbestyear” there are services out there to help those that need it.

Here’s One Question to Help You Know What Type of Business to Start in Retirement

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*guest post by Mike Lieberman

You’re looking to start a business in retirement, but you’re not sure what type of business makes sense for you.

There are so many different types of businesses you can start these days.

Where do you even begin?

There’s one key question you must ask yourself when deciding what type of business to pursue, and if you don’t, you’ll end up wasting your time and money.

Let’s avoid that mistake all together. Shall we?

What’s the question to ask yourself?

To help you get more clarity, I sought out a retirement coach who specializes in assisting Professionals and Executives as they make retirement transitions with the life side of retirement planning. His name is Kevin Lyles of Winning Retirement Coach. He’s also the Head of Education for Rock Retirement Club.

I wanted to get his perspective for you on this since he deals with such scenarios on a regular basis.

I asked Kevin, “If a client was to say to you they’re thinking of starting a business in retirement, what’s the first question you would ask them?”

“What do they want to get out of the business?” responded Kevin. “That will lead to how I could counsel them because there are many possible answers.”

Before getting into some of the answers Kevin shared with me, let’s dive into why this question is important.

Why must you answer this question

Up until this stage of your life, the work and career part has been mostly out of necessity. It’s commanded a large part of your time over the years because there are these bills and taxes we all must pay.

As you enter this next stage, the work and career part plays a completely different role. You now have more free time and you’re not as reliant on it as your main source of income each month.

This means the type of business you choose to pursue needs to align with the greater vision of how you now want to spend your time.

That vision completely shifts the thinking about the type of business you start and why that question becomes so much more important to get clear on.

Previously work and career dictated how you spent your time, now you have more control over it.

So let’s get clear on what you want to get out of your business to make sure it aligns with your vision.

Ok?

Five common answers

Kevin shared five common answers to “what do you want to get out of your business?” with me.

So let’s dive deeper into each of them.

1. I need the income
If you’re retired and you need to replace your income to continue living, you might consider continuing to work or seeking other employment.

Let’s be real. Starting a business is not easy and it’s not going to be instantly successful overnight. It’s going to take time to start producing income, if it ever does.

So if you need the business to replace income dollar for dollar, take other options into consideration.

Though if you’re within a few years of retirement and think you’ll need to replace the income, now might be a good time to start. That way you can build up the business without the pressure of instant success.

2. Extra spending money
Your financial retirement plan might be rock solid and your financial needs are met with your pension, 401K and/or savings.

What you might want to get out of your business might be extra play money.

Each year you want to take you and your entire family on a vacation.

There’s a charity you’re passionate about and want to donate to them financially.

Maybe there’s a lavish purchase you want to make for you or a loved one.

Starting a business can help to reach that goal.

3. Build a legacy for your children
Building a legacy to pass down to your children can mean many things.

It might mean building a business to hand down to your kids.

Possibly it’s building more wealth to hand down to future generations.

The legacy could be leading by example and showing your family that anything is possible at any age.

Leaving a legacy such as these might be what you want to get out of your business.

4. Solving problems for others
It’s common for people to start a business around something they’re good at and can help others with.

“That was something I liked to do,” said Kevin. “During my legal career I was working mostly for corporate clients, but I really liked helping them with their problems. So this way (through coaching), I can do it on a much more personal level to really help counsel people through their retirement transition.”

5. Purpose and meaning
As mentioned earlier, work has taken up so much of our time during our life. There will now be the large void of time.

“That’s a problem a lot of retirees face after working,” said Kevin. “If they’ve been working 10-12 hour days for 30-40 years, now they wake up and don’t know what to do with themselves. Having a business can really fill that void and give them some purpose and reason to get up in the morning.”

“If they’ve been working 10-12 hour days for 30-40 years, now they wake up and don’t know what to do with themselves.”
– Kevin Lyles, Winning Retirement Coach

Those are just some of the answers to help you get some clarity and start thinking.

Once you know what you’re looking to get out of your business, you can now focus on the details around the structure and opportunities that support your vision.

Remember “thisisyourbestyear”–make the best out of your retirement years.

**Mike Lieberman is the founder of Retirement Redefinition. He created the site to help you define your retirement lifestyle and start an online business that fits it.

Top Jobs For Seniors Who Want To Work After Retiring

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*Guest post by Tina Martin

It’s not uncommon for seniors to decide to return to the workforce part-time after retirement. There are many benefits to taking this route. For one thing, research shows that individuals tend to be happier in retirement if they keep busy and maintain a sense of purpose. A fulfilling part-time job can help towards this end. 

Money is another obvious motivator for those who choose to get a job after retiring. Many seniors worry about running out of money without a steady income. According to the Journal of Accountancy, it’s actually the number one fear among retirees. 

Not sure what job to pursue? Get inspired with the below ideas.

Sell insurance

Many people need to purchase insurance, so working in the insurance industry can be an excellent option for seniors, especially if you have a background in sales. For example, you could sell life insurance to other seniors, and you may be able to take on friends and family as your first clients. Before you look into selling insurance, research the best options for retirees.

Teach English as a second language

One key to figuring out what career path to take after retirement is to consider your transferable skills. Whatever you were doing before retirement may still serve you afterwards. If you worked in education, for instance, you might consider teaching English as a second language, either for kids or adults. 

If you want to go this route, you should get an ESL teacher certification. With this under your belt, you can apply to area language schools for part-time gigs or work on a freelance basis for yourself. The latter option gives you great flexibility in terms of timing, as you can decide when and where to work, and decide how many students to take on based on your availability and interest.

Become a tour guide

A tour guide job is a wonderful way to keep your mind active. You will have to memorize facts and statistics, and continually brush up your knowledge. This kind of brain activity will keep you sharp and stave off mental decline. Research even shows that such brain challenges can help prevent Alzheimer’s disease. You’ll also benefit from physical activity, as the job requires you to be on your feet and continuously moving. 

There are tour guide jobs available to suit all types of tastes. If you are interested in art, history, and architecture, you can check out a gig at a museum. If you would prefer to spend time outside, take a look at the platform ToursByLocals, which allows you to present tours around your hometown to interested visitors. This is also a fun way to meet and interact with diverse people from different places, cultures, and countries. 

Consider seasonal work to get started

Reentering the working world if you’ve been retired for a few years may be daunting at first. Get your toes wet by starting off with a seasonal job. There are various senior-friendly options available, such as wrapping gifts for stores. There are also non-holiday related seasonal jobs available. This AARP list suggests options like tax preparer, tutor, and National Park Service employee.

Explore the above options and you are sure to find a post-retirement gig that interests you, even if that involves launching your very own home-based business. As you reenter the workforce, you will also benefit from the increased contact with other people, which combats the isolation that sometimes comes with age. A part-time job will thus pave the way to a happier and healthier retirement. Remember “thisisyourbestyear”.

*Tina stays busy as a life coach and works hard to help herself and her clients achieve a healthy work-life balance.

Out of the Mouths of Moms

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Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms. Your words of wisdom will carry your children throughout their lives and beyond through generations. We thought we would ask our readers to share with you some of the wisdom their mother’s shared with them.

“You can’t live your life by other people’s standards, you must do what is right for you…if you want to be happy.”
Mrs. Alvin Johnson, mother of Carolyn Alexander
“The secret of life is JOY
Jesus first, Others second, Yourself last–JOY“.
Mrs. Edith Kelley, mother of Nancy Amos
“You can be whatever you desire to be/do if you put God first, be committed and never give up”.
Meshelle Stewart’s mom, Betty Hill
“The word dumb doesn‘t exist. Do the best you can with what you have to do it with”.
Mamie Coby Abdul-Raheem’s mom, Emma Coby
“Treat people the way you want to be treated”.
Mrs. Irma Rose White, mother of Pamela Berry
“(You) being present is important”.
Mrs. Mary B. Howell, mother of Rev. Dollie Howell Pankey

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY, REMEMBER YOU ARE SPECIAL–“thisisyourbestyear”.

Sheltering In Place Movie Watching

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There are a lot of things that I have been doing since I have been sheltering in place. So far I am not bored yet. A lot of people are binge watching television, but for some reason I can’t binge watch. I have, however, found some things that have caught my attention on television. Here are three movies/documentaries that I found interesting and entertaining. Each of them is different than the others.

The first one is the beautiful movie–“Of Mind and Music”. It is literally about the mind and music. This story is about a doctor whose mother has died from complications of Alzheimer’s, and his struggle to get his life back together after her death. The location of the movie is New Orleans which should tell you about the music.

While taking time off to mourn the death of his mother he encounters two street musicians, one being a beautiful singer with a name just as beautiful as the songs she sings. She is known as Una Vida to some and Queenie to others. Una Vida has the voice of an angel as long as she is singing, but also has demons that rob her of her life when not singing. This is story of voices lost and found not only Una Vida’s, but those that know and love her.

You will enjoy the sights, culture, music and sense of loss in this beautiful movie. This movie will move you.

It’s something about seeing the place where music legends started from. Seeing the piano with the keys labeled, the bathroom where they went into record that special sound and so much more will bring a song to your heart. In Detroit it’s the sound of Motown. But if you can’t get there soon try looking at the documentary “Hitsville the Making of Motown (Berry Gordy and Smokey Robinson).

The two legends talk about life before Motown and more. There are interviews with some of the music legends, and those who help to make them legends. Berry Gordy tells about his organizational plan for Motown which by the way was sheer genius. It’s nice just to see two friends whose friendship is a true friendship, and of course the music is timeless. There are things discussed that you already know, but there are tidbits that will amaze you. You will enjoy the information, and the big sing along.

“Faith, Hope and BBQ”, yep you read it correctly. This true story is about a small church, their faith, their hope and their barbeque. Throughout the movie they remind you that the church was built because of the selling of barbeque.

You will meet the man who cooks the barbeque who is also the pastor of this congregation. The story of the church that barbeque built in a small town is more about the love the congregation feels for their faith, family and community.

You will meet the members of the church who volunteer their cooking talents for the betterment of the church. The smoke from the pits will have you thinking you can actually smell and taste the meat. When one who works in the kitchen tells you she is famous for her collard greens, you will believe her.

This small, rural church and their love and faith are just a joy to see. They will have you saying Amen and pass the hot water cornbread, and the napkins.

These three things on television caught my attention and kept it throughout the films. Take a look, I don’t think you will be sorry. Remember “thisisyourbestyear”, and be safe.

Girl Talk #3

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Surviving Social Distancing

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So we have been told to stay at home, and some of us are having a hard time while others have found new callings, and our new wardrobe. Why is it so hard for some of us to be alone when really in todays world we are never alone? You know with all the social media there is always someone there.

I actually don’t remember my first few days of social distancing since I was frantically converting my face-to-face classes to online classes. It had to be done, and done quickly. After working furiously and relentlessly it was time to rest. So my next few days of social distancing were spent in pajamas. It was time to catch up on rest (you can catch up).

My first days were spent going from the bed to my favorite chair(s). There was a lot of looking at magazines, trying to find something to watch on television–I can’t binge watch. It helped that it was raining all day and night.

I kept in touch with friends and family by calling, texting, social media and more. My kids and I could see each other over the phone/computer. So all in all it wasn’t that bad. My husband was still going to court for a few hours a day, and that helped.

When you can’t go anywhere it makes you want to go more, and it was beginning to happen to my friends and me. Then we all decided that there was things that we could do.

Here are some of the things that we did:

  • Got up and moved. There were those that could do an exercise program via the internet, social media, television and more. You can do a different one every day. I have found out that I have no rhythm–Latin Zumba and I do not see eye to eye. I did however keep moving. There are some people who took walks around the block or on the track. Some that finally used that stationary bike and other equipment that was collecting dust.
  • When the sun finally came out there was yard work to be done, mowing the lawn, trimming the hedges, repotting plants and even planting flowers and that vegetable garden. I repotted plants, planted a vegetable garden, but then ran into a snake so no flowers were planted in the front flower boxes (and they may not get planted this season).
  • Many of us were a little bit more culinary inclined. Instead of preparing what we always prepared, we tried different things. We took out those gadgets, you know the Instant Pot, the airfryer, the electric skillet–we finally figured out what the convection button was on the oven.
  • Some of us even briefly went out. My sister and I went to the location of Hardie’s Fresh Foods truck, and got fruits and vegetables. They did social distancing. You never got out of the car–they bought everything to your car and loaded it.
  • We held our first Meet and Greet–Girl Talk via Zoom. Our next one is April 3 at 8 pm CST via Zoom. (Use the ID 843-171-852).
  • Deep cleaning your house is always an option. My shutters and blinds are getting deeped cleaned, and are now their original bright white.
  • Hopefully creative juices will start to flow like a river and not a slow moving one.
  • Read just for pleasure. I’m reading another Robert Parker book. It helps that I imagine Tom Selleck as Jesse Stone.
  • Prayers..no need to say anything else.

There are so many other things that people are doing and dealing with during this pandemic. Reach out to those that are truly alone, give them a call, send them a quick note. There are a large group of people who do not do social media. Remember “thisisyourbestyear“, please be safe.

Our next Zoom “Girl Talk” will be on Friday, April 3 at 8 PM CST. Please use the ID 843-171-852. See you soon.

let’s get together

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We’ve been social distancing for a few days so let’s get together and have a little girl talk. Join us for about 40 minutes of getting to know each other, and sharing our tips on surviving social distancing.

thisisyourbestyear is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting. The instructions are below:

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